Remember Sidney Poitier? The groundbreaking black actor who won an Oscar for Best actor for his role in the 1968 film ” Lilies of the Field” ? He was handsome, charismatic, polished and urbane, effortlessly projecting an air of refinement and class. I recently read that, until he was ten years old, he never saw his face in a mirror, never knew what he looked like. His parents were Bahamian tomato farmers who had traveled to Miami to sell their crop when his mother went into premature labor. Sidney was born and immediately became an American citizen. He spent the first ten years of his life on Cat Island in the Bahamas, a sun-drenched Caribbean paradise without glass doors, windows or storefronts. Without man-made reflections, young Sidney had no idea what he looked like.
This anecdote started me thinking….
We look at ourselves in the mirror daily, many times daily. We know exactly what we look like or, at least, what we think we look like. We are familiar with our facial features even if we subconsciously alter our perceptions and think ourselves younger and better looking than we really are.
How do we appear to others? People meeting us for the first time assess us, our character, our personality by what they see in our faces. Their first impressions, based on their reading of our faces are, more often than not, correct and are borne out by continued interactions.
In fact, there are face-readers who claim to see our past, even our future from what they see on our visages. They are to be found mostly in India and China and usually combine face reading with palmistry and astrology. Now I can understand that they can read our past based on face-reading, the experiences of the past may have left their mark on our faces, but how can they possible foretell the future? I never believed this possible until the amazing experience of a friend of mine. My engineering colleague “Albert”, unhappy with his future prospects, decided to sign a three year contract to work in Saudi Arabia and make some real money. However, before he signed on the dotted line he decided to consult a face reader and I went with him to New York’s Chinatown. The face reader was an elderly man, poorly clad and unprepossessing, who had set up shop on the pavement. I was unimpressed by him and felt he was a charlatan. He looked long and carefully at Albert’s face before making his prediction; Albert translated his words for me as we walked back to the office. Apparently, after correctly telling Albert about some incidents that had already happened, the man said flatly that Albert would not be going to Saudi Arabia, that he would remain in New York for the forseeable future. Albert was unconvinced and decided to go head with his plans. What next happened is still difficult for me to believe. That very night Albert got a call from Taiwan telling him that his father was desperately ill and was not expected to survive. Al immediately took compassionate leave and flew back to be at his father’s bedside. He remained there for the next three weeks as his father made a miraculous recovery but in that time Albert’s window to sign the contract expired. Just as the face reader had predicted, Al stayed on in New York for several years more.
We ordinary folk can’t be face readers, at least in the sense that we cannot predict the future. However, it may be instructive for us to take a closer look at ourselves in the mirror. Tomorrow, when you look in the mirror, look a little deeper. Not just whether your hair is combed or if your lipstick is on just right. Look deeper, at the person behind the mask, under the skin. What do you see? What do you think others will see?
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